Hi! I’m Erin, a first-year studying Classics at Durham. I’m going to share with you a little bit about my Durham experience so far with a focus on community and reassuring any worries you might have about loneliness at uni.
Leaving home
Leaving behind everything you know, your friends, family and school, in your hometown can feel extremely daunting. I know that for me, the thought of not making friends and not “fitting in” at Durham was my main concern before I arrived on move-in day. I was afraid that I would feel isolated and homesick a lot of the time.
Of course, every student’s experience is unique but ask anyone who has spent at least a term here and they will tell you that these fears couldn’t be more misguided. Whether it takes a day, a week, a month or a term you will find ‘your people’ here at Durham.
Join societies
Joining societies brings together people with shared interests and Durham has no shortage of societies! From Ballroom Dancing to Rugby to Simpsons Soc and Curry Soc there is no lack of weird and wonderful uni-wide groups to get involved with here.
However, colleges also offer the most amazing opportunity to make friends and become part of micro-communities in the form of college-level societies! I am part of my college netball and dance teams. For these, I had to take the step of going to the taster session and then the trials alone. But for all three I couldn’t be happier that I had the confidence to do this because as a result I have made friends with funny, kind and all-round lovely people not only from my year but also from second, third and fourth year!!
Coursemates
Yet, societies are not the only way of forming great friendships and helping you feel part of a bigger community. Getting to know people from your course, your flat or even people you met by chance are also amazing opportunities for making friends. Knocking on my flatmate, Alice’s, door for the first time was nerve-wracking but I have made such a strong friendship with her that I couldn’t imagine uni without her!
The truth is, everyone will feel lonely at times. Even being lucky enough to have made really good friends with my flatmates, of course, I miss my friends from home, my parents and my siblings. But the fears I had prior to coming to uni, that I would feel isolated and homesick for much of the time couldn’t have been more wrong. The network of varied friends I have made by getting involved in uni life in lots of different ways has made this an impossibility.
Be open-minded
All I would suggest is be open-minded, be yourself and do the big scary thing: knock on the door, attend the taster session by yourself, try something completely new. You will never lose anything from doing any of these things, you will only gain from them and I’m certain you won’t regret it!
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